Wednesday, March 10, 2010

sometimes things get out of control in my mind

My mind loves to wander about. Normally it'll be something silly and inappropriate, becaust mostly my mind is always in the gutter. But today, and some other bad days, I tend to think about lame things. It really sucked because i was hanging out with my friends that i don't really get to see too often. I really would like for my mind not to wander around my memories when I'm actually trying to be productive and happy. But today, I ended up thinking about my family all day. I couldn't help but to think about the things I've seen and heard at my old house. These are things that really affected me, and too many times throughout the day I wanted to just sit and cry. But that would be really strange if I were to just do that in the middle of lunch or the Puppy Center. When I think about it , I just feel like screaming, screaming like I would when the things actually happened.

I just hope that these memories will not stay with me forever, I hope I never have to tell anyone about it because I don't want them to feel bad.

I love my family and my friends, I just wish these memories would leave me, I see now, why I decided to suppress my memories from my early life...something must've happened that I never wanted to think about agian. blah....I'll keep myself busy, to try not to think too much.

1 comment:

Rachel said...

We would have been super understanding if you cried at the puppy center, or anywhere for that matter.

We're always there for you Jaimes, give us a little credit. We would be understanding if you needed to cry or to talk or just needed to sit in silence. We love you.